Damn Cats

So I'm working at home on Friday and our stupid cat continuously presses her wet nose into my calf, begging to be petted. I know this battle can't be won so I relent. 5 minutes of this is enough for me but not her, no. So I go to grab her by the belly and lift her up for a belly rub. Mistake.

Cat is fat and my angle was bad. The lift was not as dextrous as would be desired. Cat starts to freak out and immediately sinks a claw into my forearm. Deep. Really deep. I start screaming which freaks the cat out even more. Claw sunk even deeper. And yeah, I'm still holding the cat in the air.

Well it was one hell of a maneuver to extract the cat from my forearm without ripping apart major arteries. Cat lands hard and is begining to move out. Until I start screaming at the top of my lungs and chase her through the house. That'll stop that damn petting. And if Cat Scratch Fever really exists, I'll be dead in a day or two.